Friends美语学习Blog

320 The One With The Dollhouse

 

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey are there.]

Chandler: Wait a minute, wait. You’re telling me this actress person is the only woman you ever wanted who didn’t want you back?!

Joey: Yeah! Oh my God! (to Chandler) Is this what it’s like to be you?

*这是不是就是你一直的感觉？——这句话真是有杀伤力！

Monica: Wow, you’re really crazy about her, huh?

Joey: Oh, you have no idea. And-and when we’re on stage I get to-to kiss her and-and touch her, but then she goes home with the director, and it’s like somebody’s ripping out my heart!

Phoebe: Oh, it’s so great to see you feeling like this!

*看来Joey一直就只是“性爱”之上的原则。

Ross: (entering) Hey!

All: Hey!

Ross: Monica, uh Dad called this morning and ah, Aunt Silvia passed away.

Monica: Yes!! Yes! Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Ross: We were all pretty shaken up about it.

*shake up摇匀, 摇松, 摇醒, 震惊

Phoebe: Wait, am I missing something though? ‘Cause I thought death was something that’s supposed to be sad, in a way.

Ross: Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well not a nice person.

Monica: Oh, she was a cruel, cranky, old bitch! (Ross gives her a look) (to Ross) And I’m sorry she died. Did Dad say I get the dollhouse?

Ross: You get the dollhouse.

Monica: I get the dollhouse!

Phoebe: Wow, a house for dolls, that is so cool! When I was kid, I had a barrel.

Joey: Uh, Pheebs, you had a barrel for a dollhouse?

Phoebe: No, just a barrel.

*Phoebe小时候的生活的确很悲惨，不仅没有Dollhouse（其实我也没有），还没有Bike，还得跟白化病人住在一起，并且妈妈还自杀了，整个一个雾都孤儿现代版！

Monica: Y’know what, you can play with my dollhouse.

Phoebe: Really?! Really?!

Monica: Any time you want. Y’know, when I was younger, all I wanted to do was to play with this dollhouse, but no!! It was to be looked at, but never played with.

Chandler: My Grandmother used to say that exact same thing to me.

 

Opening Credits

[Scene: Rachel's office, Chandler and her are coming back from lunch.]

Rachel: Hey, Sophie!

Sophie: Hey, Rach!

Chandler: Hey.

Sophie: Hey.

Rachel: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y’know, you didn’t have to walk me all the way back up here.

Chandler: Oh, that’s-that’s okay, no problem. (He starts to look around her office.)

Rachel: Honey um, honey, you do realise that we don’t keep the women’s lingerie here in the office?

Chandler: Yes, I realise that.

Rachel: Summer catalogue! (hands him the catalogue)

Chandler: That’s the stuff! (quickly grabs it)

 

[Rachel's boss, Joanna, enters]

Joanna: Rachel, I need the Versachi invoice. (to Chandler) Hello! You don’t work for me.

Rachel: (introduces them) Joanna, this is my friend Chandler Bing (to Chandler) Joanna.

Joanna: Bing! That’s a great name.

*Chandler的又一段不堪回首的约会经历开始了，我在看完10季之后，发现他的女友几乎都是极品的问题女人，只有从Joey手里面抢过来的Cathy还算是正常。

Chandler: Thanks, it’s ah, Gaelic, for ‘Thy turkey’s done.’ So ah, I’m gonna go, nice, nice meeting you.

Joanna: Me too.

Rachel: Bye, Chandler.

Joanna: (to Rachel) So ah, what’s wrong with him?

Rachel: Oh, nothing, he’s just goofy like that, I actually, hardly notice it anymore.

Joanna: Oh no, no-no-no, is he ah, married, or involved with anyone?

Rachel: No!! No! He’s not married, or involved, with anyone!

Joanna: Oh, Rachel, (pause) actually, y’know what, forget it.

Rachel: Well, I’ll ask him for you, if you want me too?

Joanna: Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y’know something that Sophie would do?

Sophie: Uh, uh, uh, I am here.

Joanna: I know that.

*Rachel为了自己的仕途，决定将Chandler献身了，看来古今中外，美人计比比皆是！

 

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is showing off her new dollhouse. It's a huge dollhouse, that takes up the entire living room table.]

Monica: Look at it! Ohhh! Wallpaper’s a little faded, that’s okay. Carpet’s a little loose. Hardwood floors!!

Phoebe: (entering) Hey!

Chandler: Hello.

Phoebe: Oh! Ooh! Oh Monica! It’s so beautiful.

Monica: I know!!!

Phoebe: So, I’m here, ready to play.

Monica: Okay.

Phoebe: I brought a bunch of stuff for the house, so check it out. Ha-ha. (She removes this large ceramic dog that comes up to the second floor and places it next to the house.)

Monica: What’s this?

Phoebe: That’s a dog, every house should have a dog.

Monica: Not one that can pee on the roof.

*Monica的意思是那只狗也太大了，足够Pee on the roof了。

Phoebe: Well, maybe it’s so big because the house was built on radioactive waste.

*经过放射性污染——Phoebe绝对地博大胸怀，经常想到比较严肃的人类问题。

Chandler: (holding a tissue) And is this in case the house sneezes?

Phoebe: No, no, that’s the ghost for the attic.

Monica: I don’t want a ghost.

Phoebe: Well, nobody wants a ghost. But you’ve got one, because the house is sitting on an ancient Indian burial ground.

*我小时候倒是常常这么想，不过哪个时候我不知道印第安是什么地方。

Ross: Wait a minute, the house was built on radioactive waste, and an ancient Indian burial ground? That would never happen.

Phoebe: Okay, obviously you don’t know much about the U.S. government.

*政府阴谋论，是美国电视剧中常用的桥段，我们比较熟悉的X files就大大渲染了这一桥段，还有 伪装者、24小时，都将政府作为阴谋团伙来描述。

Rachel: (entering) Hey!

All: Hello.

Rachel: I need to talk to you!

Ross: Sure, what’s up?

Rachel: Oh, sorry. I meant Chandler.

Ross: I-I know. Well if something comes up… (walks away)

Chandler: Oh, I’m glad you guys are past that little awkward phase.

*说不说出来都一样，还不如说出来！

Rachel: Okay, my boss, Joanna, when you left, she started asking questions about you…

Chandler: Oh-ho, liked what she saw, huh? Dug my action, did she? Checkin’ out the Chan-Chan man!

Rachel: (looks at him) That was (pause) surreal. Okay, what do think? Are you interested at all?

Chandler: Yeah, she seemed cool, attractive. I’ll do it.

Rachel: Oh thank you, Chandler, this is so great, she’s gonna love me.

Phoebe: (holding a dinosaur) Okay, dinosaur attack!! Quick, everybody into the house!! Ahh-ahh! (the dinosaur starts attacking the house. She starts to bark like a dog.) Roof! Rrroof-roof-roof!

Monica: Okay, Phoebe, y’know what? That-that’s it, that’s it, all right? No dinosaurs, no ghosts, no giant dogs, okay? They’re not the right size, they’re not Victorian, and they just don’t go.

Phoebe: Okay, (starts to pack up her stuff) fine. Come dinosaur, we’re not welcome in the house of no imagination.

*美国是移民国家，因此这句话在这个地方的含义就可以让人联想很多。

Ross: Uh, Pheebs, while we’re hovering around the subject. I just have to say dinosaurs, they-they don’t go, rrroof!

Phoebe: The little ones do.

 

[Scene: The Theatre, Joey and Kate are getting ready to rehearse the play.]

Joey: Hey, Kate!

Kate: Morning.

Joey: Listen, I ah, went to that restaurant that you were talking about last week…

The Director: Hey, lovely! Come, talk to me a minute! (she goes over to him)

Joey: (to himself) And I ate the food, I had the fish, it was good, yeah. It was good, yeah…

Woman: Hi, oh, I’m Lauren, Kate’s understudy.

Joey: Oh, hey! Joey Tribbiani.

Lauren: I know! I-I’m a big fan of yours.

Joey: (looks at her, shocked) What?!

Lauren: I used to umm, schedule my classes so I could watch Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives.

Joey: Get out of here, really?!

Lauren: Absolutely!

Joey: Yeah?

Lauren: Oh but then, they went and dropped you down that elevator shaft.

Joey: They gave me the shaft all right.

Lauren: (laughing) Oh, you’re so funny. Listen, umm, what are you doing after rehearsals? Do you want to get a drink, or something?

*不仅想起来Joey和Monica初见，因为Monica邀请Joey喝杯东西，Joey就naked了，好笑！

Joey: Well Ahh, (he sees Kate and the director kissing) yeah! Yeah, sure, a drink sounds great.

Lauren: Cool! I-I’ll see you then.

Joey: All right.

The Director: All right, it’s time to act, my talking props. (Both Joey and Kate just look at each other.)

*我移动的小道具！？

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Phoebe is entering with her own dollhouse, that she made herself.]

Phoebe: Hey!

All: Hey!

Phoebe: Look everybody, look at my new dollhouse!!

Rachel: Wow!!

Phoebe: Look, look! (She lifts up the roof, and the front panel falls revealing the interior.)

Ross: Hey, what’s this?!

Phoebe: Oh, okay, it’s the slide instead of stairs. Watch this. (She slides a doll down the slide)

Monica: It’s very interesting, Phoebe.

Rachel: What’s this?

Phoebe: The Licorice Room, you can eat all the furniture. And, when guests come over, they can stay on the tootsie roll-away bed.

Ross: This is the coolest house ever!!

*Phoebe的想象力真实超级厉害，不过思想过与前卫的人，常常也被人误解所以叫其“傻大姐”。

*不过这个时候，Phoebe为什么不把那些狗、ghost放进来呢，看来都是宽于律己，严于待人啊！

(Monica is looking on with a hurt expression on her face.)

Phoebe: Hey, does anybody want to join me in the aroma room? (lights some incense)

Rachel: All right!

Ross: I would!

Monica: Hey, guys, guys, did you see my new, china cabinet?!

Ross and Rachel: Uh-huh.

Phoebe: Watch, watch. (She turns a strand of Christmas lights strung around the house.)

Ross and Rachel: Ooohhhh!!

Phoebe: And, and! (She turns on a bubble maker.)

Ross and Rachel: Ahhhh!!

Chandler: (entering) Hey, my Father’s house does that!

Rachel: (to Chandler) O-o-o-okay, how did it go? Tell me everything.

Chandler: Well, the movie was great, dinner was great, and there’s nothing like a cool, crisp New York evening.

Rachel: Hmm.

Chandler: Of course, I didn’t get to enjoy any of that, because Joanna’s such a big, dull dud!

 

[Scene: Rachel's office, Joanna's telling Rachel, her side of the story.]

Joanna: Chandler is fantastic!!

Rachel: What?!

Joanna: Oh God, we just clicked! Y’know how people just click? Like he came by to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you?

Rachel: Oh, I….

Joanna: Oh, and he’s got such a good heart! Doesn’t he have a good heart?

Rachel: Oh, I know…

Joanna: Oh, I know and he’s soo sweet! Listen, he said he was going to call, so put him straight through.

Sophie: Isn’t this great?!

Joanna: Don’t spoil it.

[Scene: The Theatre, Joey and Kate are rehearsing.]

Joey: Come on baby, don’t go. Please? What do you say?

[A phone rings.]

The Director: (answering the phone) Hello. Oh! It’s you. Just ah, just one-one sec. (to Joey and Kate) I am going to take this call. When I continue, I hope that there will appear on stage this magical thing that in the theatre we call, committing to the moment! (He goes to take the call.)

Joey: (to Kate) That guy’s like a cartoon. What do you see in him anyway?

Kate: He happens to be brilliant. Which is more than I can say for that sweater you’re dating.

Joey: Hey, I’m not interested in her sweater! It’s what’s underneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care who I’m going out with?

Kate: I don’t care. Why, do you want me to care?

Joey: Do you want me to want you to care?

Kate: Do you?

Joey: What?

The Director: (returning) Okay, I’m afraid to say this, but let’s pick it up where we left off.

[They resume rehearsing.]

Joey: Come on baby, don’t go. Please? What do you say?

Kate: I’ve got no reason to stay.

(Joey grabs her and kisses her.)

The Director: Stop!! Stop it! You must stop! You are bad actors! This is a terrible play! I’ll see you in the morning. (exits)

Kate: I can’t believe we go on in, in a week.

Joey: Hey, it’s gonna be all right.

Lauren: (to Joey) Hey! So since we’re getting off early, do you want to go and paint mugs?

Joey: What?

Lauren: You know! At the place I told you about last night?

Joey: Oh, yeah, with the mug painting. Yeah. I was so listening to that. But ah, y’know what, I think I kinda need to work on my stuff tonight.

Lauren: Oh, okay.

Joey: Okay. (he gives her a peck on the cheek)

Lauren: I’ll see you tomorrow. (she kisses him full on the mouth.)

Joey: Okay.

Lauren: G’night. (exits)

Joey: (to Kate) Ah, are you okay?

Kate: Yeah, I guess. Look, what are we gonna do about this scene, huh?

Joey: I don’t know.

Kate: Well umm, maybe if it had more heat.

Joey: How do you mean?

Kate: Well, Adrian’s looking for a reason to stay, right? Victor can’t just kiss her, he’s gotta, gotta really give her a reason, y’know?

Joey: Maybe he could slip her the tongue.

Kate: Or maybe, maybe he could grab her, and, and, and, and lift her up.

Joey: Yeah, yeah, and then Adrian, she maybe she could wrap her legs around his waist.

Kate: And then she could rip off his shirt and kiss his chest, and, and his stomach!

Joey: And then, then he could use his teeth, his teeth to undo her dress, and, and, and bite her!

Kate: And then right, right when the scene ends, he could take her with this raw, animal….

*我有个朋友看到这里和我说：狗男女就这样诞生了！我无语。来不来电只是只有2个人明白的事情吧！

[cut to Joey's bedroom, Joey and Kate are emerging from under the covers.]

Joey: Something like that?

Kate: Yeah, that’s pretty much what I had in mind.

Joey: Yeah.

 

Commercial Break

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross and Monica are eating breakfast as Joey enters, very happily.]

Joey: (to Ross) Hey.

Ross: Hi.

Joey: (to Monica) Hey.

(He walks up behind Monica and gives her a big hug and a kiss on the neck.)

Ross: Hi.

Joey: Hey.

(He walks over behind Ross, thinks about it for a moment, and gives him a big hug.)

*爱情让人甜密得乱七八糟！

Ross: It’s a little early to be drinkin’.

Joey: No-no, things ah, finally happened with Kate.

Ross: Ohhhhh!

Monica: You’re kidding?! That’s great!

Joey: Oh, it was so amazing. After the (pause) love making…

Monica: Oh my.

Joey: Yep. I just, I just watched her sleep for like hours, just breathing in and breathing out. And then I knew she was dreaming ’cause, ’cause her eyes keep going like this. (He closes his eyes and moves them around, kinda like he’s been processed by the devil, or something.)

Chandler: (entering with Rachel) I’m telling ya, Joanna’s got it all wrong. Okay? All I said was, ‘This was fun. Let’s do it again sometime. I’ll give you a call.’

Rachel: Ohh, gee. I wonder why she thinks you’re going to call her?

Chandler: That’s what you say at the end of a date.

Rachel: You can’t just say, ‘Nice to meet you, good night?’

Chandler: To her face? Look it’s the end of the date, I’m standing there, I know all she’s waiting for is for me to say ‘I’ll call her’ and it’s just y’know, comes out. I can’t help it, it’s a compulsion.

Monica: Come on Rach, when a guy says he’s going to call, it doesn’t mean he’s going to call. Hasn’t it ever happened to you?

Rachel: Well, they always called.

Monica: Hmm, bite me.

 

[Scene: Rachel's office.]

Joanna: (entering) Did he call?

Rachel: No. Sorry.

Joanna: Why?! Why?! He said he’d call. Why hasn’t he called?

Sophie: Maybe he’s intimated by really smart, strong, successful women.

Joanna: Sophie, would you please climb out of my butt. Why hasn’t he called, Rachel? Why?

Rachel: Okay, okay. Umm, well ah, maybe he, maybe he feels awkward because you are my boss.

Joanna: Awkward? Why should he feel awkward?

Rachel: Well…

Joanna: The only person that should feel awkward is you, and you didn’t tell him not to call me, did you?

Rachel: No. I…

Joanna: Because if you feel uncomfortable with your friend dating someone you work for, there are always ways to fix…that.

 

[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler is reading a magazine as Rachel approaches.]

Rachel: (grabbing the magazine out of his hands) Call her! Call her now!

Chandler: Multiple, so many paper cuts.

Rachel: Why hasn’t he called Rachel? Why? Why? I don’t understand. Why? He said he’ll call. Why? Why? Chandler I’m telling you she has flipped out, she’s gone crazy!

* flipped out 发狂

Chandler: (sarcastic) Oh, well give me the phone then.

Rachel: Come on, this isn’t funny. She thinks it’s my fault that you haven’t called her. You have to call her!

Chandler: Look, you can’t call somebody after this long just to say, ‘In case you didn’t notice, I don’t like you!’

Rachel: Well then you’re going to have to take her out again.

Chandler: Nooo!! She’s really dull! And she gets this gross mascara goop thing in the corner of her eye!

Rachel: I don’t care! I don’t care! You are going to have to take her out again and end it, and end it in way that she knows it’s actually ended. And, I don’t care how hard it is for you, do not tell her that you will call her again!

Chandler: All right! Fine! But it’s just a lunch date, no more than an hour! And from now on I get my own dates, I don’t want you setting me up with anybody ever again!

Rachel: That’s fine!

Chandler: That’s just a lot of big talk, y’know.

Rachel: I know.

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is entering.]

Ross: Mon?

Monica: (from the bathroom) I’m in the shower!

[He closes the door and walks over to get something from the fridge. He starts to smell something and turns around to see Phoebe's dollhouse smoking. He runs over and takes off the roof to reveal that the dollhouse fire.]

Ross: Oh, fire! There, there’s a fire! Fire!!

[He tries to blow it out, and obviously, it doesn't work. He runs over to the sink to get a glass of water to put out the fire, but since Monica is in the shower the water pressure is very low and takes a long time to fill the glass. In desperation he takes the half full glass over and dumps it on the fire, it doesn't work. He then picks up the dollhouse and considers bringing it over to the sink, but decides to take it into the bathroom and use the shower to put it out. He kicks open the door and we hear Monica scream at the top of her lungs.]

[Scene: The Theatre, Kate is arriving for rehearsal.]

Joey: Hey.

Kate: Hi.

Joey: So I ah, talked to Lauren, kinda told her how things were with us. Did you ah, did you talk to Marshall?

Kate: About what?

Joey: Y’know, about what happened with us.

Kate: Nooo. And there’s really no reason he should find out, so ah let’s not make a big deal about it, okay?

Joey: What are you talking about? It was a big deal. I mean, come on you can’t tell me last night didn’t mean something to you. I-I was there, you’re not that good an actress.

Kate: Look umm, I, I was, I was just caught up in the moment. That’s all it was. Joey, I’m-I’m sorry you feel bad, but haven’t you ever sleep with a women where it meant more to her than it did to you?

Joey: Nooo.

Lauren: (entering) Hi, Kate!

Kate: Hi, Lauren.

Joey: Hi, Lauren.

Lauren: Hi, pig!

 

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Ross are inspecting the damage to the dollhouse.]

Ross: Sorry I ah, I scared you in there.

Monica: Oh, that’s okay. By the way, I was just checking the shower massager.

Ross: Yeah.

Phoebe: (entering) Hey!

Monica: (runs over to her) I tried to reach you at work. There’s….been a fire.

Phoebe: What?! Oh my… (sees the remains of the house) Oh my God!! What happened?!

Ross: Well, we believe it originated here. (He uses a pointer and points to the point of origin.) In the Aroma Room.

Phoebe: All right. Did everyone get out okay?

Monica: Well, the giraffe’s okay. And so is the pirate.

Phoebe: Ohh. What is this? (She sees a tissue covering something, and moves to remove it.)

Ross: No Phoebe, don’t look! You don’t want to see what’s under there!!

Phoebe: (She pauses to ready herself, and removes the tissue.) Ohh, the-the Foster puppets!

(She picks up a charred piece of plastic that once was the Foster puppets, and starts to break down. Monica goes over and comforts her.)

 

[Scene: Rachel's office, Chandler and Joanna are returning from their lunch date. He is telling her about her mascara problem. Rachel is already there.]

Chandler: It’s not a big deal. It’s, just it’s right here, (points to his eye) and it’s all the time.

Joanna: Well, thanks again for lunch.

Chandler: (He looks over at Rachel, who nods her head) Yes, this, this was pleasant.

(Rachel is slowing trying to leave and let them talk.)

Joanna: It was, wasn’t it?

Chandler: The food there was, was great.

Joanna: Wasn’t it?

Chandler: So take care.

Joanna: You too.

Chandler: Well, this was great. I’ll give you a call. We should do it again sometime. (Rachel is disappointed)

Joanna: Great! I’m looking forward to it. Rachel, any messages?

Rachel: Sophie’s desk.

( Chandler starts to leave ashamed of himself, but Rachel stops him in the hallway.)

Rachel: (whispering) Chandler!! Are you gonna call her!

Chandler: Noo!

Rachel: Chandler!!

Chandler: Look, I’m sorry. Okay? I’m weak, and pathetic, and sorry.

Rachel: Okay, you are going to tell her and you’re going to tell her now. (She grabs his nipple and starts to twist it.)

Chandler: Ahhhh — I’m not going to call you.

Joanna: What?

Chandler: I’m sorry. I’m-I’m-I’m sorry that I said I was going to when I’m not. Look, this has nothing to do with you, y’know? And this isn’t Rachel’s fault. It’s me. I have serious, serious problems when it comes to women. I have issues with commitment, intimacy, (pause) mascara goop. And I’m really sorry, it’s just that this is not, this isn’t going to work out.

Joanna: Well, this isn’t how I was hoping how this would end, but I guess I have to appreciate your honesty.

Chandler: Yeah, o-okay.

Joanna: So…

Chandler: Well this is great! I’ll give you a call! We should do it again sometime!

(Rachel is shocked, and holds her arms out in disbelief.)

 

Closing Credits

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is talking on the phone.]

Joey: (on phone) Well, so anyway Beth, what I’m saying is I should’ve considered your feelings before I went home with you that night. I’ve ah, I’ve recently learned what’s it like to be on your side of it, and I’m sorry. So, do you think you can forgive me? (listens) Great. Thanks. Okay, bye. (He sits down and crosses out something, and dials the phone again.) Hello, Jennifer? (listens) Oh hi, Mrs. Loreo, is Jennifer there? (listens) Oh, she’s not home huh? (listens) Well ah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.

End

319 The One With The Tiny T-shirt

 

[Scene: Central Perk, Gunther is pouring Rachel coffee.]

Gunther: Here you go.

Rachel: Thank you.

Gunther: (In his head) Say Rachel, I was wondering if you’d like to go to a movie with me sometime. As my lover! Nnnsch, too out there. Maybe you’d just like to ah, get something to eat with me sometime? As my lover.

*Gunther对于Rachal的暗恋竟然持续了10年之久，这种坚持也确实令人佩服。

Mark: (entering) Hi!

Rachel: Hi! All right, let’s go shoppin’!!

Mark: Um, y’know, before we go ah, there’s something I need to say.

Rachel: Oh, okay.

Mark: I’ve kinda of had this ah, this crush on you. (Rachel is shocked) But since you were with Ross, I-I didn’t do anything about it. But, now that you’re not, I’d really like to ask you out sometime. So-so that’s-that’s what I’m doing, now.

*Crush on sb [美俚]通常指(女子对男性的)迷恋，不过在美国英语中，界限似乎越来越模糊，只要你想怎么说都可以。

* I didn’t do anything about it.现在我们可以确定Mark对于Rachel的确心怀不轨很久了，因此之前的误会我个人理解为故意之举。

(Gunther gets this hurt expression on his face and goes into the back room)

*连对暗恋的对象表白的机会都在瞬间剥夺了，Guther当然生气！不过，在第10季中，他也对Ross做了同样的事情。

Rachel: Wow! Umm….

(She’s interrupted by a loud crash and the sound of braking dishes. Followed quickly by another crash. Everyone turns and looks at the back room, as Gunther emerges.)

*——Guther伤心欲绝，对盘子、茶杯“排山倒海”了！

Gunther: I dropped a cup.

 

 

Opening Credits

[Scene: The hallway between the two apartments, Pete and Monica are returning from their date.]

Pete: …so y’know, that’s why, within a few years, that voice recognition is gonna be pretty much standard on any computer you buy. Y’know, so you could be like-like, ‘Wash my car.’ ‘Clean my room.’ It’s not gonna be able to do any of those things, but it’ll understand what you’re saying.

* hallway走廊

*Pete的思想逻辑性以及拐弯抹角的能力很强哦！

Monica: Oh, this is so great.

Pete: Yeah, it was.

Monica: All right then. (He leans in to kiss her goodnight, but she quickly kisses him on the cheek and pats his shoulder.) Bye.

*感情不应该为金钱而妥协，这点我很佩服，并且也值得N多人学习！

(She goes into her apartment and sees Chandler, Phoebe, and Ross sitting there.)

Monica: Hello, people who do not live here.

*有时候，我觉得他们就住在这里，所以，他们在大结局结尾搬家的时候，对这个房子有无限的留恋，美国时代广场上的观众也哭成一片。

All: Hi! Hello!

Monica: I gave you a key for emergencies!

Phoebe: We were out of Doritos.

* Doritos我没有找到解释

Ross: Hey, how’d the date go with Mr. Millionaire?

Chandler: Mr. Millionaire, new from Snooty Playthings! Third wife sold separately.

* Snooty傲慢的, 自大的, 鄙视别人的

Monica: He’s great! I mean we have such a good time together! He’s so funny, and sooo sweet, and I’m not attracted to him at all!!

Ross: Still?!

Monica: Noo!! It’s driving me crazy. I mean every other way he’s like the perfect guy, he has everything. Plus! He actually has everything.

Chandler: Life-sized Imperial Storm Troopers from Sharper Image?

Monica: Two.

*太富有了，太富有了！！！

Chandler: Wow!! Can Joey and I put them on and fight?

*Chandler确实把Joey作为生活中不可分开的玩伴了，所以到哪里都想着他，好友啊！

Joey: (entering, dancing and singing) Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big old baddie! Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big old baddie! (He dances around the dinner table and exits)

* baddie恶人

Ross: I guess he musta gotten the part in that play.

Monica and Phoebe: Oh.

Chandler: Yeah, either that, or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually, the rhythm is going to get you.

 

[Scene: A Theatre, Joey is arriving to rehearse the play he's in.]

* rehearse预演, 排演, 使排练

The Director: Joe. How’s it going?

Joey: Good. (He sets his stuff down and starts talking to Kate, another cast member.) Hey.

Kate: Hi.

Joey: Oh, so you’re playing Adrienne, huh?

Kate: Yes. Are you one of the retarded cousins?

Joey: Oh, no. Ah, I playing your husband, Victor. I’m Joey Tribianni.

Kate: Hi, nice to meet you. Kate Miller.

(She goes over to the snack table, and Joey quickly runs over and pours her a cup of coffee.)

Joey: So the ah, play’s pretty great, huh?

Kate: Oh, yeah. I love Jennifer Van Murray’s work. She’s so brilliantly incisive when it comes to deconstructing the psyche of the American middle class.

* incisive adj.深刻的, 尖锐的, 激烈的

* psyche n. 1.心智 2.灵魂；精神

*和Joey说这些，就是对牛弹琴啦，虽然那头牛挺帅的！

Joey: Oh, forget about it. She rocks!

Kate: Where do I know you from?

Joey: Dr. Drake Remoray. Days of Our Lives. Voted most datable neurosurgeon by Teen Beat.

Kate: No, that’s not it. So, you’re a soap actor? Well this must be pretty exciting for you to be in a real play, hmm?

Joey: Hey, I’ve done plays before. I’m a serious actor.

Kate: That info-mercial! For the milk carton spout thing! You’re-you’re-you’re the guy that doesn’t know how to pour milk!!

Joey: See, I actually can pour milk, but I got you believing that I couldn’t. Now, see, that’s acting.

*这个解释我觉得很有说服力！

Kate: Right, at the end, you choked on a cookie.

* choke v.窒息, 哽住, 使呼吸困难, 阻塞

Joey: Yeah, that was real.

*把刚才那点印象分都丢光了！

 

[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is telling Phoebe about Mark, as Gunther eavesdrops behind them.]

* eavesdrop v.偷听

Phoebe: Wow! I cannot believe Mark asked you out.

Rachel: I know.

Phoebe: What, so what are you gonna tell him?

Rachel: Well, I told him I would think about it, but I’m gonna tell him no.

Phoebe: Huh.

(Gunther tries to swoop in to ask Rachel out.)

Rachel: I mean I think I’d say no to anybody right now. (Hearing this Gunther swoops back to cleaning tables.) Oh, but it was so strange. I mean I’m standing there with this charming, cute guy, who’s asking me to go out with him, which I’m allowed to do, and I felt guilty. Y’know, like I’d be cheating on Ross or something.

*这一段话应该说出了很多恋爱中男女的心态，尤其在分手时期，无论是真分手还是假分手。

Phoebe: Wow. So, okay, maybe that means that, you’re not over Ross yet and you have issues with your father.

* have issues with sb 和某人有问题；有过节

Rachel: I don’t have any issues with my Father.

Phoebe: Okay, so it’s probably just the Ross thing then.

 

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Joey is telling Chandler about Kate.]

Joey: I hate this woman!! I hate her! She told everyone in the company about that info-mercial, and now they all keep asking me to open their drinks. Okay, and whenever I can’t do it, they’re all like-like laughing at me.

Ross: (entering) Hello.

Chandler and Joey: Hey!

Ross: So Rachel called. Wants to see me. Going over in a minute.

Joey: Wow, what-what do you think she wants?

Ross: Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realises that life without me ah sucks.

*Ross自我感觉太良好了

Chandler: It’s possible. You are very loveable, I’d miss you if I broke up with you. (Ross glares at him) I was just trying to be supportive.

*拍马有点过分了，而且关系比喻的有点怪怪的，呵呵

Ross: Then be supportive like a guy.

*指Chandler的刚才的话是把自己作为女性的角度发出的，其实Chandler经常和女生换位思考，应该是Sensitive吧！

Chandler: (in a deep voice) If I broke up with you, I’d miss you.

*这句话更加暧昧，哈哈，在看过《断背山》的今天，看来更加暧昧。

 

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is there as Ross enters, walking very confidently.]

Ross: Hi.

Rachel: Hi!

Ross: You ah, wanted to see me?

Rachel: Yeah. Ahh, here’s a box of your stuff. (hands him a box)

Ross: What?!

*啊哦，Shocked！

Rachel: Oh, y’know, it’s just like hats, and a shirt, and CD’s, just sort of stuff that you’ve left here.

Ross: What are you doing? Are you trying to hurt me? Or something?

Rachel: No. Ross, it, it just seems that y’know it’s time we-we y’know, move on. I mean, I mean don’t’ you think?

Ross: Yes.

Rachel: Yeah?

Ross: Yes, I do.

Rachel: Good.

Ross: Yeah, I-I really do. (takes a dinosaur mug out of the box) Hey! This-this was a gift?!

Rachel: Ross, you got that for free from the museum gift shop.

Ross: It’s still a gift! I got it from the gift shop!

Rachel: Okay, all right, give me the mug! I’ll keep the mug.

Ross: No!! Y’know-y’know don’t do me any favours. In fact, where, where’s the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm, (picks up a book) Hey, this book is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? I’d like that back too. Yes, I do.

Rachel: You know how much I love that T-shirt! You never even where that T-shirt!

Ross: I’m just trying to help you, move on.

Rachel: Oh, you are a petty man. You are a petty, petty….

Ross: Petty…

Rachel: Petty… (goes into her room)

Ross: Petty…

Rachel: Petty…

Ross: Petty…

* petty;小气 small 小心眼。这样好用的口语词还有很多；如：cheap;小气difficult难以相处

Rachel: Small…

Ross: Small… (Rachel comes back into the living room and catches Ross mocking her.)

Rachel: You are so just doing this out of spite.

* out of spite 为泄恨, 为出气

Ross: Awwwahuh, no, no, no!!

Rachel: Huh?

Ross: I’m-I’m gonna wear this all the time! I love this shirt!! (he kisses the shirt)

Rachel: You have not worn that T-shirt since you were 15!! It doesn’t even fit you anymore!

Ross: Oh, yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah…

Rachel: (imitating him) yeah-yeah-yeah!!

Ross: Oh-oh, okay, okay! (He quickly takes off his sweater in order to put on the T-shirt. It’s an old ‘Frankie says relax’ T-shirt, that barely fits him. Rachel nods her head in approval of the new look.) If you don’t mind I’m gonna the rest of my stuff, and relax, in my favourite shirt. (Starts to leave) You have a pleasant evening. (He exits and leaves the door open.)

 

[Scene: Central Perk, the gang minus Rachel and Ross are talking to Pete.]

Phoebe: So, you’re like a zillionaire? (Pete smiles and nods)

*zillionaire n.亿万富翁, 财富多得不可计算的人

Chandler: And you’re our age. You’re our age.

Phoebe: Y’know what, you should like, you should buy a state and then just name it after yourself.

Pete: What like Pete Dakota?

Phoebe: Yeah, or, or, or, Mississ-Pete.

Joey: Oh, oh, I got it! Pete-Chicago.

Chandler: That’s not a state Joe.

Joey: Oh, and Mississ-Pete is?

Pete: I got to go, so ah, I’ll see you guys later.

All: Okay.

Chandler: You’re our age!

Pete: (to Monica, by the door) So ah, we on for tomorrow?

Monica: Absolutely! (He goes to kiss her, but she stops him and rubs his head and says…) Now get out of here you!! (Pete leaves) (to the gang) Okay, I’m running out of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am I only attracted to guys where there’s no future? Either they’re too old, or they’re too young, and then there’s Pete who’s-who’s crazy about me, and who’s absolutely perfect for me, and there’s like zip going on! I mean, seriously, does it sound like something’s wrong with me?!

Phoebe: Yeah, kinda.

 

[Scene: The Theatre, Joey and Kate are rehearsing for the play.]

Kate: Happy?! Is that what I’m supposed to be Vic? Happy?

Joey: Well, why don’t you tell me what you’re supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell can’t figure it out! I talk to you and nothin’. You look at me, and it’s nothin’. (He kisses her) Nothing.

The Director: Tasty! I’m really starting to feel like you guys have a history, it’s-it’s nice.

Kate: I have a question about this scene.

The Director: Yes?

Kate: Well, I don’t understand why Adrienne’s attracted to Victor.

The Director: Peel the onion. First of all, he’s good looking.

Joey: Yeah.

Kate: I think my character’s gonna need a little bit more of reason than that.

Joey: Oh, hey, how about this one. Ah, it’s says so in the script! Y’know ah, I-I don’t know why my character likes you either, I mean it says in the script here that you’re a bitch.

Kate: It doesn’t say that in the script.

Joey: It does in mine!

*Joey发火的时候还很厉害！

 

[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler and Ross are returning from working out.]

Chandler: I can blow dry it. I can put gel on it. It doesn’t matter, I still wind up with this little (pats the flat spot on the back of his head) cowlicky thing on the middle part of my head. It’s so annoying. Does it bug you?

Ross: You bug me.

[Rachel comes out of her apartment, followed by Mark, and they leave on their date, without saying a word to Ross. Ross is stunned.]

Chandler: Is there any chance you didn’t see that?

Commercial Break

 

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is watching a basketball game, Ross is staring out the peephole.]

Chandler: Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You can’t just stare through the peep hole for three hours! You’re gonna get peep eye!

Ross: I knew it! I knew it! I always knew she liked him! Y’know, she’d say no, but here we are! Right? We just broke up, first thing she does!

Chandler: You didn’t just break up.

Ross: Hey, it’s been like three weeks!

Chandler: You slept with somebody three hours after you thought you broke up. I mean bullets have left guns slower!

Ross: Here they come, here they come. Oh-ho, if she kisses him goodnight, I’m gonna kill myself, I swear. I can’t, I can’t watch this. (turns away, then quickly turns to look again) Come on, date over! Date over! Uh-oh, here we go, she’s going in.

Chandler: Okay.

Ross: She’s going in. Wait! He’s going in! He’s going in!! The door’s closed! I, I can’t see anything but the door closed!!

Chandler: And the inventor of the door rests happily in his grave.

Ross: Okay, I have to do something. I mean, I have, I have to stop it!

Chandler: Stop what?!

Ross: I don’t know, but I ah, I have the feeling that my being there will do it. I’ll go over and I will borrow something. Juice!! I need juice!!

*Ross崩溃了，关键时刻总是暴露了自己内心很小气的心态。很不男人！

(He starts to exit, but Chandler tries to stop him by climbing on his back and grabbing hold of the foosball table.)

Chandler: No!! You can’t!!

Ross: Look, they must be stopped!

Chandler: I am your friend, and I am not gonna let you do this!! (Ross is now dragging Chandler and the foosball table to the door) You are surprisingly strong!

Ross: I need juice! People need juice!!

Chandler: Look man!

Ross: People need juice!

Chandler: Listen to me!! ( Chandler turns him around and closes and holds the door shut with his feet.)

Ross: Juice, I need…

Chandler: She’s moving on! Okay, if it’s not this guy, it’s gonna be somebody else! And unless you’re thinking about subletting my peep hole, you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man? It’s over.

* you are going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over!很多人在分手时候不能自已，就是因为不明白这句话！

Ross: Yeah, okay.

Chandler: Okay.

Ross: It’s just I miss her so much.

Chandler: I know. (He rubs Ross’s head)

*朋友的安慰在这个时候很温馨！

 

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is pouring Mark some coffee.]

Mark: Why do all you’re coffee mugs have numbers on the bottom?

Rachel: Oh. That’s so Monica can keep track. That way if one on them is missing, she can be like, ‘Where’s number 27?!’

(She sits down, and Mark leans over and kisses her. Rachel doesn’t react. He tries it again, and Rachel jumps back quickly.)

Rachel: Y’know what?

Mark: No. And I don’t think I’m gonna want to.

Rachel: I can’t do this.

Mark: Yep. Yep, that’s what I didn’t want to know.

*也够坦白的，冷幽默！

Rachel: Well, oh, Mark, I’m doing this for the wrong reasons, y’know? I’m just doing it to get back at Ross. I’m sorry, it’s not very fair to you.

Mark: Ahh! Fair, schmair! Y’know? Look, if you want to get back at Ross, I am here for you. Really? No-no, I say-I say, I say we get back at him right on this couch. Right here!

Rachel: Oh God. I’m sorry about this.

Mark: That’s okay.

Rachel: You sure?

Mark: Yeah. I can just go home and get back at him by myself.

 

[Scene: A Hospital Reception, Monica and Pete are there.]

Spokeswoman: …has become the penicillin of the twenty-first century. And so today, this hospital is about to take major steps toward leading that revolution. It is truly ironic, on one hand consider the size…

* penicillin n.[微]青霉素（一种抗菌素，音译名为盘尼西林）

* ironic  adj.说反话的, 讽刺的

Pete: (to Monica) Hey, can I ask you something?

Monica: Sure.

Pete: Where are we?

Monica: (looks around) Well, with all these doctors and nurses, I’m gonna say, midget rodeo.

Pete: Just tell me the truth.

Monica: Okay. Umm, y’know, I don’t think, I don’t think I told you this, but umm, I just got out of a really serious relationship.

Pete: Oh, yeah. Wasn’t that like a year ago?

Monica: So I did tell you. Okay, y’know, that really isn’t the thing. Umm, the thing is that, right now I’m just in a place in my life where I need to focus on me. Y’know what I mean?

Pete: Oh, yeah. I know that.

Monica: I so wanna be attracted to you.

Pete: But you’re not. Okay, good.

Monica: I’m sorry.

Pete: Y’know what, don’t be. This is not, don’t be, ’cause it’s not so bad.

Monica: It’s not?

Pete: I know I’m no John Bon Jovi, (Monica laughs) or someone who find attractive, I’m just, I think, y’know, that you might end up feeling differently.

Monica: Well, um, look I-I don’t want this to come our wrong, but ah, you seem awfully confident for a guy I just told I wasn’t attracted too.

Pete: Yeah, stupidly charming isn’t’ it? Well listen let’s, you wanna get something to eat? ‘Cause this place is kinda depressing. (they start to leave)

Spokeswoman: And the man who made all this possible… Mr. Peter Becker.

Pete: (to Monica) One second.

(He takes the scissors, cuts the ribbon, shakes her hand, posses for the picture, and leaves.)

*不知道为什么，我不喜欢Pete，所以这一段略看一下就过了。

 

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Chandler is sitting in one of the black chairs, and turns to face the other one.]

Chandler: I don’t think this town is big enough for both of us to relax in. (He blows on his hand) Draw!! (He quickly pulls the lever to raise the foot rest, like a gunfighter in a Western.)

(Joey enters.)

Chandler: (to Joey) I wasn’t doing anything. (Joey starts angrily throwing his stuff down.) Uh-oh, what did she do now?

Joey: Just because she went to Yale drama, she thinks she’s like the greatest actress since, since, sliced bread!

Chandler: Ah, Sliced Bread, a wonderful Lady MacBeth.

Joey: God, I just, I hate her! I hate her!! With her, ‘Oh, I’m so talented.’ and ‘Oh, I’m so pretty,’ and ‘Ooh, I smell so good.’

Chandler: I think somebody has a crush on somebody.

Joey: Hey, Chandler, can we please stay focused on my problem here?! Y’know?

Chandler: I’m talking about you. You big, big freak.

Joey: Oh. (realises) Ohh. Ohh, you’re out of your mind.

Chandler: Hey, you have nothing but talk about her for the last 48 hours! If you were in a school yard you’d be pulling her pigtails and pushing her down now!

*有时候我们在乎一个人其实就是感情的开始，Joey不是讨厌她，而是讨厌她不喜欢他。

Joey: Oh, yeah?! Then how come I keep thinking about her in all these sexual scenarios and stuff huh?!

[Scene: The Theatre, Kate and Joey are rehearsing the same scene as before.]

Kate: Happy?! Is that what I’m supposed to be Vic? Happy?

Joey: Well, why don’t you tell me what you’re supposed to be! Huh? Because I sure as hell can’t figure it out! I talk to you and it’s nothin’. You look at me, and nothin’. (He kisses her, more passionately this time) Nothing.

The Director: You guys make me fly! High! Okay, we’re gonna pick it up here, tomorrow.

* make me fly 让我乐翻天了

Kate: Well, that was ah…

Joey: Better?

Kate: Yeah! Yeah, it was definitely an improvement. G’night.

Joey: Ah, Kate?

Kate: Yeah?

Joey: You ah, you forgot your shoes.

Kate: (she giggles) I’m probably gonna need those. Huh? (she giggles some more)

Joey: Hey, listen you ah….

Kate: Hmm?

Joey: …feel like getting a cup of coffee?

Kate: Umm.

The Director: (leaning in) Kate?

Kate: Yep.

The Director: You ready to go?

Kate: Yeah.

The Director: (to Joey) Very nice. Very nice. (he walks away)

Kate: So umm, I’ll see you tomorrow, huh?

Joey: Yeah, yeah sure, goodnight.

 

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica is in the kitchen chopping vegetables. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting in the living room.]

Phoebe: (to Chandler) Hey! ( Chandler looks up, startled) Why isn’t it Spiderman? Y’know like Goldman, Silverman…

Chandler: ‘Cause it’s-it’s not his last name.

Phoebe: It isn’t?

Chandler: No, it’s not like, like Phil Spiderman. He’s a spider, man. Y’know like ah, like Goldman is a last name, but there’s no Gold Man.

Phoebe: Oh, okay. There should be Gold Man!

Rachel: (entering) Hey!

Monica: Hey, Rach, how was work?

Rachel: Oh, great. Although I did sit down where there wasn’t a chair.

Monica: By the way, Ross dropped by a box of your stuff.

Rachel: Oh, well, I guess I had that one coming. I’m just gonna throw it out, it’s probably just a bunch of shampoo and… (she opens the box and stops)

Monica: Something wrong?

Rachel: (She takes the T-shirt out of the box and holds it to her chest and take a deep breath.) No. Nothing. (She smiles and goes into her room.)

*从情人到朋友，感觉比较复杂，失落、怀念、感动… …

*一个关于分手爱人的“理还乱”到“剪不断”的过程

 

Closing Credits

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Phoebe and Chandler are sitting in the black chairs.]

Chandler: So, ahh, what kind of powers would Gold Man have?

Phoebe: Okay well, he would turn things to gold.

Chandler: What about things that are already gold?

Phoebe: Ahh, his work is done.

Chandler: Okay, let’s play my game now.

Phoebe: Okay. All right you yellow-bellied-lilly-livered-DRAW!! (they both kick up the foot rests like an old fashioned gun fight.)

End

318 The One With The Hypnosis Tape

 

[Scene: Central Perk, all but Chandler are there, Joey laughs for no apparent reason.]

*(Joey总是为了一些简单天真地事情傻笑，我在同情其幼稚的时候，还是有点羡慕他的简单单纯)

Monica: (to Joey) What’s so funny?

Joey: Oh, nothing, no. It’s an acting exercise, I’m practicing my fake laugh.

Monica: Oh. (she laughs)

Joey: What-what’s so funny?

( Chandler enters with a cigarette.)

Gunther: (to Chandler) Oh, no-no, no-no-no, there’s none of that in here.

*there’s none of that in here  注意，在here前面的in在书面语法中不常出现，但是在口语中比较频繁出现。

Chandler: Oh come on man! At least let me finish this last one.

Gunther: Okay, but only if you give me a drag.

*drag除了我们常见的“拖、拽”之意外，还有个意思：A puff on a cigarette, pipe, or cigar.吸：对香烟、烟斗或雪茄的一吸

Chandler: Okay.

( Chandler hands him the cigarette, and he takes a long drag.)

Gunther: Oh dark mother, once again I suckle at your smokey tit. (hands Chandler back the cigarette.)

Chandler: No-no, why don’t you hang on to that one.

(He goes and sits down next to Rachel and puts a cigarette in his mouth, which Rachel takes away from him. He puts another cigarette in his mouth, and Rachel takes it away again.)

Chandler: Okay, that’s like the least fun game ever.

Rachel: Well, I’m really sick of your smoking, so I brought something that is going to help you quit. (hands him an audio cassette)

Chandler: Oh. (takes the cassette and puts it on his arm like the stop smoking patch, and it falls off.) Nope, that patch is no good. (Joey and Monica both do their fake laughs.)

Rachel: Come on, it’s a hypnosis tape. This woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasn’t smoked since.

*hypnosis n.催眠状态, 催眠,我也曾经是用过催眠音频，结果只要他在说，我就睡不着觉，根本就是“失眠”音带。

*straight有两个意思比较常见在欧美电视剧中，一个就是上面使用的“持续地、不间断地”，还有一个意思就是指“异性恋”，在Sex and the City中，频率及其频繁。

Ross: Pffhah.

Rachel: (to Ross) What’s your problem?

Ross: Nothing, it’s just that hypnosis is beyond crap.

Rachel: Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City.

Ross: Hey, that guy did not hypnotise me! Okay.

Rachel: Oh right, ’cause you always pull your pants down at the count of three and play Wipe-out on your butt cheeks.

Phoebe: All right, y’know forget hypnosis. The way to quit smoking is you have to dance naked in a field of heather, and then bath in the sweat of six healthy young men.

Chandler: Or what my Father called Thursday night.

 

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier, Ross is handing Rachel a cup of coffee.]

Ross: Here you go.

Rachel: Oh, y’know what, I didn’t want cinnamon on this.

* cinnamon 肉桂

Ross: Sorry. (To remedy that, Ross scoops the cinnamon off of the top with his hand.)

*remedy vt.治疗, 补救, 矫正

*scoop掏

Frank: (entering) Hi!

Phoebe: Oh my God!!

Frank: Hi!

Phoebe: Frank! Hi!

Frank: How are you?

Phoebe: What are you doing here?

Frank: Oh, well y’know, I would’ve called but I lost your phone number and then ah, my Mom locked me out of the house so I couldn’t find it. And then, I tried to find a pay phone, and ah, the receiver was cut off. So…

Phoebe: What happened?

Frank: Ah, oh, the ah, vandalism.

* vandalism n.故意破坏艺术的行为

Phoebe: But, also, what happened between you and your Mom?

Frank: Well, we got into a fight ’cause ah, she said I was to immature to get married.

Phoebe: You’re getting married?!

Frank: Oh, yeah!

All: Wow!

Phoebe: My little brother’s getting married!!

Frank: Oh, I knew you’d be so cool about this. All right, ah, hey, do you want to meet her?

Phoebe: Do I?

Frank: Do you?

Phoebe: Yeah, I do, yeah.

Frank: Okay, cool, all right, she just ah, parking the truck. (to Joey) I’m gonna, I’m gonna get my ah, my fiancee man!

Chandler: Y’know, I would’ve bet good money that he’d be the first one of us to get married.

Phoebe: Yeah, isn’t it fantastic?

Monica: Yeah, ah, but Pheebs don’t you think he’s a little young to get married?

Phoebe: What, he’s 18.

Ross: Exactly, it’ll be illegal for him to drink at his own bachelor party.

Joey: Yeah, or-or to get a hooker.

Chandler: Always illegal Joe.

Frank: (entering with his fiancee Alice, who is obviously much, much older than he is) Hey! Hey! This is ah, my fiancée, Mrs. Knight. (he points out Phoebe to her)

Alice: Y’know it-it’s funny, um, Frank told me so much about you, but your not how I pictured you at all.

Phoebe: Yeah, I’m a big surprise.

(Ross lets them both sit in his chair.)

Monica: So, um, how-how did you guys meet?

Frank: Well um, I was in ah Mrs. Knight’s ah, I mean Alice, sorry, Alice, I always do that. I was in her ah, Home Ec class.

Alice: And he was my best student.

Frank: Yeah, she was my best teacher.

Alice: Ohhh. (They embrace in a very passionate kiss.)

Chandler: If that doesn’t keep kids in school, what will?

Ross: And so now you guys are gonna be married?

Alice: Yeah. Y’know we-we talked about just living together, but um, we want to have kids right away.

(Both Chandler and Phoebe have shocked looks on their faces.)

Rachel: Oh my God!! Great!

Phoebe: Wow, kids. Frank, are you sure you’re ready for that?

Frank: I mean, how hard can it be? Y’know, I mean, y’know, babies, y’know who doesn’t want babies right? And besides y’know, I never had a Dad around, and ah, now-now I always will, ’cause y’know, it’ll be me. Right?

Alice: Y’know, I mean, really we do realise that there’s an age difference between us.

Phoebe: Oh good! Okay. ‘Cause you were acting like you didn’t.

Alice: Oh no, but when it comes to love, what does age matter?

(They both growl and hiss at each other and then kiss passionately again.)

 

[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, Chandler is listening to the hypnosis tape.]

Hypnosis Tape: You are falling fast asleep. Deeper. Deeper. Deeper. You are now completely asleep. You don’t need to smoke. Cigarettes don’t control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. A strong, confident woman.

 

[Scene: The Moondance Diner, Monica is working, Rachel is having lunch.]

Monica: And y’know what, I just realised, in the last year I’ve only gone out with two guys, Richard and Julio. You gotta help me out here, you gotta set me up, you gotta get me back in the game.

Rachel: Well, that shouldn’t be a problem. I mean I work in fashion and all I meet are eligible straight men.

* eligible adj.符合条件的, 合格的

Monica: (to a customer) Pete, can I get you something else?

Pete: Yeah, a slice of cheesecake and-and a date if you’re given’ ‘em out.

Monica: Haven’t you and I covered that topic?

Pete: Hmm, come on, you just said to her that you….

Monica: Aww, the only reason you want to go out with me because my blond wig, and the big boobs, and the fact that I serve you food.

Pete: Well, if that were true, I’d dating my Aunt Ruth. And the two times we went out were just plain awkward. (to Rachel) Come on, you think she should go out with me, don’t you?

Rachel: (laughs) Well, I mean, are you sure you want to go out with her? I mean that ain’t a pretty picture in the morning, y’know what I mean. That wig all in disarray, and boobs flung over the night stand, y’know.

Monica: I mean really, think about it.

Pete: Ho-ho, I will.

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are being lectured by Phoebe.]

Phoebe: No, I know, I know, that this is Frank’s life, (walks behind them, they turn around in the leather chairs to face her) y’know. Y’know, I don’t want to be all judgmental, y’know, but this is sick, it’s sick and wrong!

* judgmental adj.审判的 在欧美电视剧集中，我们常常听到I‘m not judging you.这说明，在国外，一个人对另外一个人的观点应可以不同意，但是不可以批判，这也是尊重人权的一个方面。老罗也说过类似话题。

Ross: Pheebs, what, is it the age thing?

Phoebe: No-no, oh, I’m fine with the age thing y’know, until it starts sticking it’s tongue down my little brother’s throat!

*表现心口不一，这个说法也比较典型

Joey: Pheebs, he seems to enjoy it.

Phoebe: But, I mean, do you think he’s gonna enjoy it when he’s up to his elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is not fair to Frank, (she walks behind them again, and hey again turn to follow her) and it-it’s not fair to the babies, and y’know what, it’s not good home economics.

Joey: Well, have-have you told him how you feel?

Phoebe: Yes. Not out loud.

*不能讲出来，因为那样就是在judge him.

Ross: Pheebs, if you don’t tell him, soon he’s gonna be married, and then you’re gonna hate yourself.

Phoebe: Yeah, but if I do tell him, then he’s gonna hate myself. I mean look at him and his Mom, I can’t. (pause) But, you guys can, please you gotta talk him out of it.

Ross and Joey: No-no-no-no-no. (They start to turn away, but Phoebe stops them, and turns them back to face her.)

Phoebe: Come on, you guys, you have nothing to lose, I have everything to lose. Do you want me to lose everything? Everything?!

Ross and Joey: No.

Phoebe: Okay, I’m gonna go get Frank. (exits)

Joey: So, we’re walking down the street and I turn to you and I say, “Hey, let’s go hang out at Totally Nude Nudes,” remember? And then, and then, you turn to me and say, “Nah, let’s just hang out at your place.” Well, that was a nice move dumb ass.

*dumb ass 我没有懂，谁知道怎么解释，给个TIP！

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel and Monica are entering.]

Rachel: I think you should definitely go out with this guy.

Monica: Nah, he doesn’t do anything for me.

Rachel: Monica, last Saturday night, what happened on Walker: Texas Ranger?

Monica: Well, umm, Walker was looking for this big bus load of kids…. (realises) All right, I get your point.

Rachel: All right.

Chandler: (entering, carrying a briefcase) Hi.

Monica: Hey.

Chandler: Y’know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I just carry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?

Monica: Uh, yeah.

Rachel: Hey, how are those tapes working out for ya?

Chandler: Y’know what, pretty good.

Rachel: Yeah?

Chandler: Good! I haven’t smoked yet today, I feel great, and-and-and confident, that is a stunning blouse.

* stunning adj.足以使人晕倒的, 极好的

Rachel: Thank you.

Monica: Here you go.

Chandler: Thanks

Rachel: Hey Mon, let’s give Pete a chance Come on, he was funny, he seems really nice, and that check thing was adorable.

Chandler: What check thing?

Monica: As a joke, this customer at work who has a crush on me gave me a $20,000 tip. His number is on the check, he just did so I’d call him.

Chandler: (reading the check) Pete Becker. Pete… (quickly grabs a magazine and opens it up to show her a picture) (pointing to the picture) Is this him?

* Pete Becker 我认为他是以比尔-盖茨为原型杜撰出来的人物。

Monica: That’s Bill Clinton.

Chandler: Who’s he huggin’?

Monica: Oh my God! That’s Pete! But why is Bill huggin’ Pete?

Chandler: This guy invented Moss 865! Every office in the world uses that program!

Rachel: We use it!!

Chandler: There you go!!

Rachel: Oh my God, Monica’s gonna go out with a millionaire.

Monica: I’m not gonna go out with him.

Rachel: Oh my God, I can’t believe this is a real $20,000 check, oh this is just so exciting.

Monica: Or incredibly offensive.

Rachel: Oh yeah, sure, that too.

( Chandler is putting on the Chap Stick the same way that women put on lipstick, including the bit with the piece of tissue.)

Chandler: (to the girls who are staring at him) What?

*Chandler在这场戏里面相当女性化，而且在其他的情节中也很Sensitive，这也是许多杂志怀疑他是Gay的理由之一。

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Ross and Joey are talking to Frank.]

Ross: All we’re saying is don’t rush into anything.

Joey: Yeah, come on, think about it. You’re 18, okay, she’s 44, when you’re 36, she’s gonna be 88.

Frank: What, you don’t think I know that?

Joey: Look, the point is, there’s a lot of women out there you haven’t even had sex with yet!

Ross: Yeah, he-he’s right, he’s right. This is your time y’know, yeah, you’re young, you’re-you’re weird, chicks dig that.

Frank: Okay, but isn’t sex better when it’s with one person that you really, really care about.

*这是许多人都不清楚的、关于爱的真谛的一种诠释。

Joey: Yeah, in a poem maybe.

Ross: No the man’s right, that’s what I had with Rachel.

Frank: You don’t have it anymore?

Ross: No, I ah, I slept with someone else.

Frank: Okay, so wait, all right, so how does that make things better?

Ross: It didn’t.

Frank: Okay, so what you used to have with Rachel, is what I’ve got with Alice.

Joey: Now, wh-what, what is that like?

Frank: It’s so cool man, it’s so, it’s just ’cause being with her is so much better than like not being with her.

Ross: Yeah, yeah.

Joey: (to Ross) Why can’t I find that?

Ross: Don’t ask me, I had it and I blew it!

Joey: Well, I want it!

Frank: You can have it!

Joey: I don’t know, maybe I can’t. I mean, maybe there’s something wrong with me.

Ross: Oh, no! No!

Frank: It’s out there man! I’ve seen it! I got it!!

Joey: Then you hold on to it!!

Frank: All right, man!!

Joey: All right, congratulations you lucky bastard! (hugs him)

 

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, it's after Ross and Joey's talk with Frank, and Phoebe's is finding out what happened.]

Phoebe: (to Joey) You’re Frank’s best man?!

Joey: I couldn’t help it, there love is so pure.

Phoebe: Well then, (to Ross) what about you?! Huh?!

Ross: I’m the ring bearer.

(As Phoebe stands there in shock and disbelief, Chandler comes out of the bathroom and walks to his bedroom. He’s just got out of the shower and has the towel wrapped around himself high across his chest, and another towel wrapped around his head, like women wear towels. Joey watches Chandler wondering what the hell he’s doing.)

 

Commercial Break

[Scene: Phoebe's, Phoebe is opening the door.]

Phoebe: Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. I’m so glad you could come, ’cause I’ve got a real umm, Home Ec emergency. (Points to the table cloth, which has a huge mustard stain on it.)

Alice: Oh my God, who died on this?!

Phoebe: Yeah, I know. It’s a real mustard-tastrophe. Can you help me?

Alice: Absolutely. Okay, first we’ll start with a little club soda and salt, and then if that doesn’t work we can go back to…

Phoebe: Y’know what, forget it. It’s ruined.

Alice: Oh no-no, never say that. If we can’t get it out then we can cut around the stain, add a little lace, you make a stylish throw.

Phoebe: Or instead, maybe you could just not marry my brother Frank.

*论据完全不支持论点，甚至连象征或者比喻都没有。

[Scene: Pete's office, he is participating in a conference call with three other employees, each of whom are on a different TV screen that he controls with a remote.]

Pete: Okay, that’s great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit on the head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.

All: Got it. Yeah all right. Yeah, okay.

(The intercom buzzes.)

Secretary: You have a Miss Monica Geller here.

Pete: Uh, absolutely, yeah, sEnd her in. (Monica enters) Hi.

Monica: What the hell is this? (holding up the check)

Pete: Hang on a second. (to the employees) I’ll-I’ll talk to you in the morning. (turns two of the three off) I’m sorry what?

Monica: Seriously, what is this supposed to mean?

Pete: Well, y’know, I never know how much to tip.

Monica: You’re supposed to double the tax. Not double the tax of Romania. I mean, what’s-what’s the deal? Are you, are you trying to buy me? Is this the way you get girls to go out with you?

Employee: Umm, I’m still here.

Pete: (turns off the TV) You’re taking this all wrong. Because, if I didn’t leave you that tip, you wouldn’t of come down here, we wouldn’t be having this argument, and there wouldn’t be this ah, heat between us.

Monica: What?!

Pete: Come on, you gotta admit that our relationship is ah, is hitting a new level now. ‘Cause you used to be like the chef, and I was the customer, and now we’re like this-this couple that fights.

Monica: Okay, umm, you’re a loon.

* loon n.懒人, 笨蛋, [动物]潜鸟

Pete: Look, forget the check, okay. (rips up the check) I like you. I think you’re great. Come on, what do you say?

Monica: I don’t know.

Pete: Why not?

Monica: ‘Cause I don’t want to encourage this kind of behaviour.

Pete: One meal! That’s all I’m asking for. Please? We go out, we eat, and if you don’t have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.

 

[Scene: Phoebe's, she is coming home. She turns on the lights, and sits down on the couch.]

Frank: (hiding under a pile of clothes) Hi. (She jumps up screaming.) Wait, no! Just put the mail down. It’s-it’s me!

Phoebe: Okay. Whoa, sorry. Why were you just like all in the dark?

Frank: Oh well, um, your, your laundry just smelled so good, that I thought I’d curl up in it. Is that all right?

Phoebe: Oh, yeah, sure. So, how was your day?

Frank: Oh, well just probably the worst one since I’ve been alive.

Phoebe: What umm, what happened?

Frank: Umm, Alice ah, she ah, called it off.

Phoebe: Oh no. Did umm, did she say why?

Frank: Uh, no, not really, just that I was too young, y’know, but I don’t see how I could all of the sudden be too young, ’cause I’m older than I was when we first got together.

Phoebe: Yeah, yeah, no, I don’t, I don’t know. But, y’know what, maybe it’s just all for the best?

Frank: Yeah, if the best is like unbelievable pain!

Phoebe: Oh, sweetie, oh. (hugs him)

Frank: Y’know, I just was finally happy y’know. For the first time in my life! After my Dad left me, and then, and then getting arrested for stealing those birds, and then, and then the whole punctured lung thing! I can, it’s still really hard to take deep breaths in cold weather, but with Alice all that stuff kinda went away. And now it’s, and now it’s gone and I don’t know why!

Phoebe: Uh, well I can tell you why. It’s, it’s because of me. But, y’know what, I only did it because I love you. Okay?

Frank: What?

Phoebe: Umm, well I, I kinda had a little chat with Alice, and I sort of made her see why you two shouldn’t be together, y’know. And you’re gonna see it to, one day, you really, really will.

Frank: Wait a minute, wait, this is because of you?

Phoebe: Okay.

Frank: Well, you, wait no, my Mother didn’t want us to be together, but the worst thing she ever did was tie me to the porch.

Phoebe: Okay, but.

Frank: Wait, y’know what, I-I came to you because I thought you’d understand! Oh no!! Y’know, I would storm out of here right now if-if I had some money, or a place to go…

 

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is getting Monica ready for her date. The guys are also there. The door buzzes.]

Rachel: Oh my God! The millionaire’s here!

Chandler: (in a feminine way) Oh my God! (and he jumps all around)

Monica: Guys, please, I’m just gonna have dinner with him. Okay?

Chandler: Okay, okay, just because he buys you dinner, does not mean you owe him anything.

Monica: I know!!

Chandler: Okay, then get the lobster!

Monica: (opening the door) (to Pete) Hey!

Pete: Hi.

Rachel: Hi!!

Joey: Hey!

Ross: Hi!

(They’re all staring at him, with big, huge smiles on their faces.)

Joey: Hey, how much cash do you got in your pocket right now?

Monica: And that’s why, I’m not inviting you in for a drink. (starts to leave) Bye.

All: Oh-no-no-no-no….

Rachel: Just one drink?!

Monica: (in the hallway) So, where do you want to go?

Pete: Hey, you like pizza?

Monica: Oh, that’s sounds great.

Pete: I know a great little place.

[Cut to a shot of the coliseum in Rome, Italy.]

*超强！！！

[Scene: A restaurant in Rome, Monica is paying for the pizza.]

Pete: You’re, hey, you’re not paying for the pizza!

Monica: Oh come on, it’s only fair, you paid for the flight. Now is, is that enough lire?

Pete: Ahh, I’d throw another thousand on that.

Monica: Why, how much is that?

Pete: That’s about 60 cents.

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, it's the middle of the night. Joey is walking into the living room, and runs into the entertainment centre.]

Joey: Every night!!

(He starts to walk to the bathroom and hears the hypnosis tape from Chandler’s bedroom.)

Hypnosis Tape: You do not need to smoke. Cigarettes don’t control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. A strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. (Joey walks out smiling to himself.)

[Scene: Phoebe's, Frank is watching TV, and he's very depressed as Phoebe enters.]

Phoebe: Hey, Frank. Look, okay, I know that you think I did like this totally evil thing, but I so didn’t. There’s someone here who can explain this better than I can.

Alice: Hi Frank.

Frank: Hi, Mrs. Knight.

Alice: Phoebe’s right Frank. I know it’s hard to hear, but it would’ve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we, we want the same things now, in the future we may not. (to Phoebe) Is that it, is that what it is?

Phoebe: Yeah, but not just that.

Alice: Right, not just that. Umm, even though we love each other as much as we do, none the less…

Phoebe: None the less.

Alice: None the less. Umm, you’re too young to, to really know what you want. (They embrace in a passionate kiss.)

Phoebe: That’s right, exactly. (sees them) All right, it’s a good bye kiss, that’s good. (Frank picks Alice up and they move to the couch) Bye-bye. (They both lie down on the couch and start to make out.) Okay, no, the important thing is that you see what I’m saying, y’know, just y’know, this is clearly wrong. (They ignore her) Okay, I’ve decided I’m gonna let this happen! Okay, can I just get my purse? (She reaches in and Alice moans) Okay, all right, good. (leaves) .

 

Closing Credits

[Scene: Chandler's bedroom, he's listening to the hypnosis tape again.]

Hypnosis Tape: Cigarette’s don’t control you. You are a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke.

Joey: (He’s recorded his voice on the tape) Joey’s your best friEnd. You want to make him a cheese sandwich everyday. (he laughs) And you also want to buy him hundreds of dollars worth of pants.

( Chandler wakes up and stares at the tape.)

*我想即使Joey没有这段录音，Chandler也已经把他视为最好的朋友了。

End

 

 

317 The One Without The Ski Trip

 

[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are sitting on the couch reading.]

Joey: Can I see the comics?

Chandler: This is the New York Times.

Joey: Okay, may I see the comics?

Joey似乎永远都搞不清问题的重点在哪里，呵呵！

[Monica and Phoebe enter.]

Monica: Guys. I thought you were taking Ross to the game?

Chandler: We are. He’s meeting us here.

Monica: No! Rachel is meeting us here.

Phoebe: Oh come on, they can be in the same room.

Joey: Yeah, you shoulda been there last night.

Phoebe: Why? What happened now?

Joey: Well Ross was hangin’ out over at our place, Rachel comes over to borrow some moisturiser from Chandler….

Chandler: Yeah y-you, how hard is it to say something? Rachel came over to borrow something.

Joey: Anyway! Her and Ross just started yelling at each other.

作不成情侣一般都转作敌人了，尤其是爱得比较深的一对，这一点中外雷同！

Phoebe: Wait. Why was he yelling at her? He’s the one who slept with someone else.

Joey: Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened, that she should of forgiven him by now.

Phoebe: Whoa!! He is soo unreasonable! God, although I think I understand what he means. Oh my God, this is like 60 Minutes, okay, when, when, at first you’re really mad at that pharmaceutical company for making the drug and then y’know you just feel bad for the people because they needed to make their hair grow.

pharmaceutical n.药物 adj.制药(学)上的

Chandler: Y’know what this is like? This is like when my parents got divorced. Man, I hope Ross doesn’t try to kidnap me after Cub Scouts.

Cub Scouts童子军宿营

Phoebe: Y’know I had a dream where Ross and Rachel were still together, they never broke up. And we were all just like hanging out, and everyone was happy….

Joey: I had the same dream!

Phoebe: Yeah, and nobody slept with that Xerox girl.

Joey: Oh, I had the opposite dream.

Chandler: Y’know what maybe it’s gonna be okay, I mean it’s been a week.

Joey: Yeah, I mean it’s never taken me a week to get over a relationship.

Monica: It’s never taken you more than a shower to get over a relationship.

从上面对话看来，在一周左右平复分手伤痛的比较普遍，So what is about you?

 

[Rachel enters.]

Monica: (seeing her) Okay, let’s go!! Let’s hit the road!!

hit the road [美俚]动身, 出发

Rachel: Hey!

Monica: Let’s get the show on it!

Rachel: Okay, let me just get a cup of coffee.

Monica: Oh Rachel, I know the best coffee house and it’s sooo close.

Rachel: Closer than here?

Phoebe: (turning around and picking a cup off of a table) Oh, hey, look, I found coffee! (handing her the cup) Okay, let’s skedaddle.

skedaddle n.逃走 vi.逃走

Rachel: Wait, I’m not just gonna drink somebody’s old coffee.

Phoebe: Okay, your highness.

Highness 与His,Her 或 Your 连用，用来称呼王子（亲王）或公主（王妃）

 

 [Ross enters behind Rachel, and look at each other for a moment.]

Phoebe: (in a deep voice, imitating Ross) Um, Rachel I’m really sorry. (imitating Rachel) That’s okay, do you wanna get back together? (imitating Ross) Yeah, okay. (in her normal voice) Did anyone else hear that?!

 

Opening Credits

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, the whole gang is there, except for Ross and Rachel. Joey is trying to eat Chinese with chopsticks and fails miserably. There's a knock on the door, and Chandler answers it to reveal Rachel]

chopsticks  n.筷子

Rachel: (softly) Is he here?

Chandler: No.

Rachel: Oh. (smiles) Here’s your moisturiser. Hi!

Monica and Phoebe: Hey!

Rachel: You guys are gonna love meee! Okay, check it out, Thursday night, five tickets, Calvin Klein lingerie show, and you guys are coming with me. (they’re all silent and look away) Okay, I said that out loud right?

lingerie 妇女贴身内衣

Chandler: Yes, yes, it’s just that we ah, we kinda all ready, made plans with Ross.

Rachel: Oh, well okay. Well, there you go.

Phoebe: No, it’s just that he got this new like home theater dealie, and he wants y’know, us to check it out.

Rachel: Hm-mm.

Chandler: Yeah, he’s really excited about it too, he even recorded show times on his answering machine.

Rachel: Ohh!

Monica: We’re sorry honey.

Rachel: Oh, it’s okay. (starts to leave)

Joey: Rach, it’s, it’s ah, it’s not that we don’t want to, really. (quietly) Are we talking models in their underwear?

Rachel: And heels.

Joey: (He turns around to Chandler looking for approval to go with Rachel, Chandler mouths ‘Come on!’) (turning back to Rachel) Ross, did ask us first, and we set that night aside.

Rachel: No, hey, come on, if he asked you first, that’s only fair. (leaves)

[ Chandler makes a noise of absolute disgust and heads into the living room.]

Phoebe: Ohhh boy, do I feel bad.

Joey: Oh yeah.

Monica: Very bad.

[We see Chandler lighting up a cigarette.]

Phoebe: Chandler what are you doing?!

Monica: Chandler!!

Chandler: (jumps back and points at the cigarette) Oh my God!

Joey: You’re smoking again?!

Chandler: Well, actually, yesterday I was smoking again. Today, I’m, I’m smoking still.

Phoebe: Why would you start again after chewing all that quitting gum?

Chandler: Look, I’m telling you this is just like my parents divorce, which is when I started smoking in the first place.

Monica: Weren’t you nine?!

Chandler: Yeahhh. I’m tellin’ ya something, that ah, first smoke after nap time….

[There's a knock on the door.]

Chandler: Oh that’s great, with my luck, that’s gonna be him.

Phoebe: Him? Him, Ross?

Chandler: Nope, hymn 253, His Eyes Are On The Sparrow! When my parents got divorced is when I started using humour as a defence mechanism. (answers the door and it’s Rachel again.)

I started using humour as a defence mechanism. 这句话透漏了Chanlder性格中的最明显的特色——用幽默作为自己的护身符。

Rachel: Hi! Uhh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? Because I have my sister on hold, and she said that we could use her cabin for the weekend and go skiing. Huh? I’m asking you first, right?!. I mean I’m playing by the rules.

All: Absolutely, yeah!

Rachel: Chandler! You’re smoking? What are you doing?!

Chandler: Hey, shut up!! You’re not my real Mom!!

[Scene: Ross's, the gang, minus Rachel of course, is there. Chandler is forced to smoke by an open window.]

Joey: (obviously cold) Hey, can you close that window Chandler? My nipples can cut glass over here!

Phoebe: Wait. Really?! ‘Cause mine get me out of tickets.

Ross: Look, you guys I just wanna say, I really, really appreciate you spending this time with me. It’s been a pretty hard time right now, so I just wanna say thanks.

Chandler: Can somebody else hug him? I have to stay by the window.

哈哈，这么感动的时刻被Chanlder说得一点也动人了。

Ross: Oh hey, hey, huh, how about this weekend we have a laser disc marathon okay, and maybe a tournament on my new dart board? Huh, huh, what do you think? (in an Irish accent) Two days of darts, it’ll be great!

marathon  n.[体]马拉松赛跑(全长42,195米), 耐力的考验

tournament  n.比赛, 锦标赛, 联赛

dart board 飞镖盘

——Ross果然无聊！比起Rachel的女士内衣展览，这个晚上真是糟透了！

Joey: It’ll be great for next weekend.

Ross: No, no, no, this weekend guys!

Joey: It’ll be great for next weekend. I mean, (in an Irish accent) it’ll be grrreat.

Ross: What’s going on?

Phoebe: Well, we were um, sorta invited to go skiing, y’know Rachel’s sister’s cabin. ( Chandler goes back to the window to smoke again.)

Ross: So, for the whole weekend?

Monica: We’re really sorry, but um, she did ask us first.

Ross: Yeah, that’s okay, I mean if you guys all have to go away for the first weekend I’m alone by myself, y’know then I totally, totally understand.

——明显的博取同情嘛！Ross有的时候真实很小气啊！

Phoebe: Y’know what, I can stay, I’m gonna stay. ‘Cause the last time I went skiing I was to afraid to jump off the chair lift, I just went around and around.

Joey: Uh, Pheebs we kinda need you to drive us all up there in your grandmother’s cab, but y’know what, I’ll stay.

Monica: Noo! I’ll stay. He’s my brother.

Ross: What a pity stay?

Monica: No! We’re gonna have fun. We can make fudge!

fudge n.梦话, 胡话,

Ross: Pity food? Y’know what that’s okay, all right, I don’t need any of you to stay, okay nobody stays.

Chandler: Well, then, I might as well offer to stay.

as well 另外；也：同样地：

我本来也要说留下来的——真是个不折不扣的个马后炮。

 

[Scene: In Phoebe's Grandmother's cab, driving up to the cabin. Phoebe's driving, Rachel's sitting shotgun, Chandler, Monica, and Joey are in the back seat.]

Joey: (to Chandler and Monica) Hey, does anybody else feel bad about Ross?

Monica: Why? Do you think he’s still mad at us?

Chandler: (to Joey) Well he’s probably mad after you called him this morning to borrow his goggles.

goggle n.眼睛睁视, (复数)风镜, 护目镜

Joey: What? Mine aren’t tinted.

tinted带色彩的

[ Chandler starts to light a cigarette.]

Phoebe: Chandler!!

Chandler: What?

Phoebe: What does the sign say?

Chandler: Beam me up Jesus.

Phoebe: No, the ‘No Smoking’ sign. There’s no smoking in my Grandmother’s cab.

Chandler: Okay, well, then, I-I have to go to the bathroom.

All: Oh!

Phoebe: Please!

Monica: No Chandler no! No unscheduled stops. You can go when we stop for gas.

Chandler: Oh, come on, there’s a rest stop right up there! Come on, I really have to goooooooooo.

Joey: Oh, now I have to go!!

[Scene: The rest stop, Phoebe's pulling in.]

Chandler: Here we go. Okay, brace yourselves.

Monica: What?

[Both Chandler and Joey put their feet up against the glass, Monica doesn't and gets thrown up against the glass.]

Rachel: Okay.

Monica: Ow!

[Joey gets out and sprints to the bathroom and Chandler follows with a cigarette in his hands.]

Phoebe: (to Rachel, who’s staying in the cab.) Aren’t you gonna go?

Rachel: No. Thank you.

Monica: (getting out) No, Rachel never pees in public restrooms.

Rachel: Well, they never have any paper in there y’know. So my rule is ‘no tissue, no tuschy.’ (Phoebe laughs and gets out.) Well, if everybody’s going. (She gets out and starts to close the door.)

Phoebe: No, y’know what don’t close it (Rachel slams the door shut locking themselves out.) ’cause the… keys…are in there.

Chandler: Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no!!

Joey: What’s going on?

Chandler: (to Joey) My lighter’s in there! (points to the cab)

 

Commercial Break

[Scene: The rest stop, the gang is still stuck, Chandler is kneeling at the rear bumper.]

Chandler: Damn! (stands up) The tailpipe’s not hot enough to light this!

Joey: Relax okay, I-I-I can get this open. Anybody have a coat hanger?

Chandler: Oh I do! Op, no, wait a minute, I took it out of my shirt when I put it on this morning.

Monica: So, if you’re parents hadn’t got divorced, you’d be able to answer a question like a normal person?

Joey: Look, I just need a wire something to jimmy it. Oh hey, one of you guys give me the underwire from your bra!

jimmy  vt.用铁撬撬开

Monica: What?!

Rachel: What?!

Joey: Come on! Who has the biggest boobs?

Monica: Please!!

Joey: Whoever has the biggest boobs, has the biggest bra, therefore has the biggest wire.

The Girls: No, not getting my bra!

Joey: If you wanna get back in the car, we need the wire, your call.

Phoebe: Okay, Monica’s are the biggest.

Monica: These tiny, little non-breasts?! Please, it’s gotta be Rachel.

Rachel: What, no, no, no, mine are deceptively small I mean, I-I-I actually sometimes, st-stuff my bra.

Monica: All right then, your bra would still be big.

Rachel: No, I stuff outside the bra.

Chandler: Ladies, ladies, let’s just compromise okay? Phoebe, Rachel take off Monica’s bra.

Phoebe: All right, forget it, nevermind, you can have mine.

[ Chandler crumples up his cigarette pack and throws it on the ground.]

Rachel: (seeing him) Chandler, what are you doing? There is a trash can right there.

Chandler: Well, I thought if I littered, that crying Indian might come by and save us.

Phoebe: (finishing removing her bra) Okay, there.

Joey: Thank you Phoebe, that is very, very generous.

Chandler: Okay, now let’s decide who has the nicest ass.

Joey: (opening the door) And there you go!

All: Oh, yeahhhhh!!!

[They all run to get in the cab, and Chandler pulls out a smoke.]

Monica: Chandler!!

Chandler: At least let me smoke it to the good part.

[Phoebe puts the car in gear and starts to back out.]

Phoebe: Okay. (The car moves a few feet and sputters to a stop.) Oh, no!

Rachel: What, what’s it, what’s going on?

Phoebe: Yeah, this has happened before.

Rachel: So you know how to fix it?

Phoebe: Yep. Put more gas in.

 

[Scene: Carol and Susan's, Carol is setting a romantic dinner for Susan as there is a knock on the door.]

Carol: (answering the door) Hi!

Ross: (entering) Hey.

Carol: Hey, what are you doing here?

Ross: Well, oh just ah, I was just wondering, when you and I split up, did you get the tape that was half the last episode of M*A*S*H and half the hostages coming home?

Carol: Ah yeah, but now it’s Susan and me in Mexico and the hostages coming home.

Ross: Where’s Ben?

Carol: He’s sleeping.

Ross: Ahh. (notices the table) Ooh, is this a ah, is this a bad time?

Carol: Umm, yeah, actually, Susan’s gonna be home any minute, it’s kinda an anniversary.

Ross: Oh! I thought you guys got married in uh, January?

Carol: It’s not that kind of anniversary.

Ross: Ah! (realises) Oh.

Carol: Sooo!! Anyway…

Ross: Umm, candles, champagne, yeah anniversaries are great. ‘Cause you know love lasts forever, y’know. Nothing like it in this lifetime, money in the bank, so Rachel and I broke up.

Carol: Oh God, Ross I am so sorry.

Ross: Yeah, well.

Carol: Y’know what, I want to talk to you about this so much, but we should probably do it when we could really get into it, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?

Ross: Oh yeah, I’d love that.

Carol: Oh, great! Me too.

Ross: I guess it all started when Rachel got this new job. (he sits down at the table.)

 

[Scene: The rest stop, Phoebe is on the phone to the motor club.]

Phoebe: Okay, yeah. (to Monica and Rachel) Triple A can pick us up.

Rachel: Great!

Phoebe: Yeah, what town are we near?

Monica: Freemont. West-Westmont, ah Westburg?

Phoebe: (to Monica) Then why are you answering? Do you at least know what route we’re on?

Rachel: Yeah, we are definitely on Route 27.

Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) We are at a rest stop on Route 27. Okay. (to Rachel) There is no Route 27. (listens) (to Rachel) Okay, either 93 or 76?

Rachel: I don’t know, I’m sorry, I always slept in the back when we drove up here.

Phoebe: Okay. (on phone) Hey, can you send somebody up and down 76 and check every rest stop, and, and also 93? (listens) Okay! (hangs up) Yeah, no they don’t do that.

Rachel: Ugh, okay, well somebody will come and save us.

Monica: Who? I mean have you seen a car come by here in the last hour and a half? I think we should call Ross, maybe he can get a car and come pick us up.

Rachel: No! No, I am not getting in a car with Ross, we will just have to live here!

Phoebe: But if…

Rachel: No you guys, I am not getting in a car with him, you’ll have to think of something else.

Phoebe: Oh good, oh Joey and Chandler are back.

[Joey walks up helping Chandler.]

Monica: So the going for help went well?

Joey: Oh yeah, Smokey Joe here got half way to the highway and collapsed.

Chandler: I have the lung capacity of a two year old. (starts to light another cigarette.)

Monica: Then why are you smoking?

Chandler: Well it’s very unsettling.

 

[Scene: Carol and Susan's, Ross is eating the dinner Carol made for Susan.]

Ross: ….right? Right? I mean it’s pretty unbelievable y’know, I mean they just took off, took off without even looking back. Y’know I don’t, I don’t need them, huh, I’ve got you guys now as friends, you and Susan.

Carol: Ah, Susan will be so pleased.

[Ross's beeper goes off.]

Ross: (looking at the page) 717? (to Carol) Where’s 717? (He gets up to return the page, Carol starts to take the last of the food into the kitchen, but Ross grabs the last piece.) Hey, you’ve have more of these for Susan right?

Carol: No. But it’s okay, I’ll just put out pickles or something.

[Cut to the rest stop, Monica and Phoebe are waiting anxiously by the phone as it rings.]

Phoebe: (answering the phone) (whispering) Ross, thank God.

Ross: Pheebs? What, why are you whispering?

Phoebe: I ate a bug.

[Rachel starts to walk up.]

Monica: (running over to stop Rachel) Hey Rach, the tampons here are only a penny. Let’s stock up. (takes her into the bathroom)

Phoebe: Listen Ross, we ran out of gas, and we don’t know where we are, so we can’t get a tow truck.

Ross: Oh, now you want a favour?

Phoebe: Yes, please.

Ross: Well, oh, I’m sorry your car broke down Pheebs, but I’m a little too busy with some of my real friends right now, but please call to let me know you got home safely okay?

——Ross真的很小器！

Carol: (running over and grabbing the phone away from Ross) (on phone) Phoebe, hang on a second. (Hands Ross her keys) Here, take my car, go pick up your friends.

Ross: No, I’m not gonna pick them up.

Carol: Listen, we both know you’re gonna do it ’cause you’re not a jerk. Okay? So you can either sulk here for a half hour and then go pick them up, or save us both time and sulk in the car.

Ross: No, Rachel doesn’t want me to….

Carol: Look, I-I-I am sorry that Rachel dumped you ’cause she fell in love with that Mark guy, and you are the innocent victim in all of this, but don’t punish your friends for what Rachel did to you.

Ross: Yeah, you’re right.

Carol: (on phone) Phoebe hang on a second Ross wants to say something. (listens) What? (listens) (to Ross) You slept with someone else?!

Ross: We were on a break!!! Okay!! (grabs the phone) We were, we were…, (calms down) yeah. Where are you? I’ll find you. (hangs up)

Carol: You slept with another woman?

Ross: Oh, you-you’re-you’re one to talk.

[Scene: The rest stop, Joey is making a sign.]

Joey: Okay, done.

Monica: (reading the sign) What’s ‘pleh’?

Joey: That’s ‘help’ spelled backwards so that the helicopters can read it from the air!

Monica: Huh. What’s doofus spelled backwards?

 

[Ross drives up.]

Rachel: (all excited) Op, op, car! Car!! (sees it’s Ross) Ugh!!!

Phoebe: Oh, it’s Ross on one of his drives!

Chandler and Joey: Hey!!

Phoebe: Hi!

Rachel: What is he doing here?!

Ross:He is saving your butt, ah, unless of course I’m stepping on some toes here, in which case I can just mosey on, I’ve got plenty of people to help on the Interstate.

mosey vi.漫步, 徘徊, 匆匆离去

interstate adj.州际的

All: No! Come on!

Rachel: All right!! Fine! Fine.

[Ross grabs the gas can he brought along, and walks through Joey's sign destroying it.]

Joey: Arrrghh!!

Chandler: Oh no, now it’s not gonna make any sense!

Phoebe: (to Chandler and Monica) You guys, what, what do we do about Ross who drove all the way up here? What do we do? Just like send him back and we’re then gonna go skiing?

Chandler: Oh, this is horrible, it’s just horrible.

Joey: Guys, do you think we should ask Ross to come along?

Monica: I know, what about Rachel? I mean how are we even gonna ask her?

Rachel: Ask me what?

Monica: Umm, if ah, it might be okay if Ross came skiing?

Chandler, Phoebe, and Joey: No, I wasn’t gonna ask you that, no.

Rachel: You guys are unbelievable. No! He cannot come.

Ross: Excuse me?

Chandler: It’s horrible.

Ross: (sarcastic) Oh please, can’t I come to your special, magical cabin?

sarcastic adj.讽刺的

Rachel: Why would you even want to come Ross? You’re a horrible skier.

Ross: Oh-oh, hitting me where it hurts, my ski skills.

Monica: Here we go again.

Joey: I-I can’t handle this, you guys.

Chandler: Y’know what, I can handle it, handle’s my middle name. Actually it’s the ah, middle part of my first name.

Ross: All right Pheebs, your cab’s ready.

Rachel: All right, let’s go!

Ross: You’re welcome.

Rachel: Oh, I’m sorry, were you speaking to me or sleeping with someone else?

Ross: We were on a break!

我对这句话也听了N遍了，因此我同意后面Rachel的那个建议。

Rachel: Y’know Ross why don’t you put that on your answering machine!

Ross: Hey-hey, it’s valid okay? And I’m not the only one who thinks so, Monica agrees with me.

Rachel: (to Monica) What?!

Monica: (shyly) I don’t know.

Ross: That’s what you said last night.

Monica: What I said was, was that I understood. Joey’s the one who agreed with you!

Ross: Okay.

Rachel: Really Joey?

Joey: (pause) What?

Phoebe: Y’know what, but there is, there is no right or wrong, here.

Rachel: No, I think it’s very obvious who’s wrong here.

Ross: Obviously not to Joey.

[They all turn around and look at Joey.]

Joey: (pause) What?

[They all start fighting with each other.]

Ross: (to Rachel) Look both, Joey and Monica feel the same way that I do. No-no-no-no.

Chandler: Guys, guys, guess who I am?! (starts dancing around in an effort to stop the fighting.)

[They stop briefly to look at Chandler, but then start fighting again.]

Phoebe: Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! Hey!!! (they all stop fighting, Chandler continues to dance.) Look what you’re doing to Chandler!! ( Chandler finally stops) (to Ross and Rachel) Yeah, look, we know this is really, really hard for you guys. Okay? (Ross starts to leave) You don’t, all right you don’t have to love each other, okay? You don’t, you don’t even have to like each other much right now. But please, you have to figure out a way to be around each other.

Phoebe有的时候总能说出一些大道理来。

Joey: Yeah, and not put us in the middle.

Phoebe: Yeah, otherwise, I mean that’s, that’s, that’s just it for us hanging out together. Y’know is that what you want? (they both look away) Can you be civil?

Rachel: Yeah.

Ross: I can.

Phoebe: Okay. Good, all right, let’s get back in the car, ’cause it’s freezing, and my chest is unsupported.

Joey: Oh what, wait, wait a second, I mean, what are we doing? Who’s going with who?

Ross: Look, you guys, you guys should go. (Joey tries to say something, but Ross cuts him off.) No, I’m, you, you planned this all out, and I don’t want to ruin it, so you guys should just go.

Joey: Come on man, you drove all the way up here.

Ross: No, no, really, I’ve got to take the car back anyway, I’m spending all day tomorrow with Ben, It’s fine, no guilt I promise.

Rachel: Thank you.

Monica: All right, we’ll call you when we get back.

Ross: Okay.

Phoebe: Maybe we can like go to a movie or something.

Ross: Okay.

Phoebe: Or, or the rodeo!!

Ross: That would be great.

Phoebe: Okay!

Chandler: I was being Shelly Winters from The Poseidon Adventure.

Ross: I know!

[They all get in the cab and drive away.]

Phoebe: Bye!!!

[Ross tries to start the truck, and discovers the battery's dead.]

 

Closing Credits

[Scene: Carol and Susan's, Carol is running to answer the door.]

Carol: (looking through the peephole) Ugh. (opening the door) Ross!

Ross: (entering) Hi! Sorry I’m late. Were you sleeping?

Carol: Ahh, nooo!!

Ross: Oh, great! Listen, oh I had to get you a whole new battery. I got you the best one I could, ’cause that’s not where you want to skimp.

Carol: You’re a genius, Ross.

Ross: Yeah, well it came to about $112, but what the hell, just call it an even 110?

Carol: Okay, I’ll pay you tomorrow. (pushes him out the door)

Ross: Okay.

Carol: Okay, bye!!

Ross: So they ah, they all took off, it was pretty hard watching them go, y’know?

Carol: Yeah, okay, bye. (closes the door, turns out the lights, and runs back to the bedroom)

Ross: (outside the door) So I’m gonna take off then!

End

这一集没什么好说的，都比较容易的句子。